Excellence vs. Mediocrity

~In a recent episode of Oprah’s Next Chapter, aired on July 22, 2012, Oprah interviewed 10 iconic American Olympians. During her interview with Carl Lewis, the topic of excellence and mediocrity was discussed.~

“My parents always raised us to expect excellence.”

– Carl Lewis, 9 time Olympic gold medalist

“When you grow up in a family that doesn’t expect excellence, when [you] see excellence, [you] often get threatened by it. But if you’re raised to expect excellence, you embrace excellence. Because you see it as your birth right.”

–Oprah Winfrey

Excellence versus mediocrity. On the surface, we become acutely aware of which word should be sought after and which word would be more pleasurable to experience once attained, but the dilemma is that excellence requires more of each one of us. It requires us to be less selfish and give more of our time and energy. Mediocrity, on the other hand, is content with selfishness and laziness. Mediocrity observes what the minimum effort is to attain what is desired and once that point is reached, promptly puts its feet on the table, places its hands behind its head and calls it a day.

As the Olympics have gotten underway in London, there are multiple scenes of excellence. Even for those Olympians who do not earn a place on the podium, numerous moments of excellence are achieved. Their efforts over the past four years or more to train, to discipline their minds and bodies often in very isolated practice facilities reveals what excellence asks of us: a clear focus, an elimination of the whining when things get tough and instead the steely eyed focus to push on, time – lots of valuable time, discipline of training, diet, and thoughts and of course the audacity to believe what is desired can be achieved.

You may be wondering, how does this apply to my life? How can I channel Olympic excellence into the goals that I seek? As I’ve shared before, excellence is not the same thing as perfection, and it is important to keep this in mind. As you travel the journey of achieving your dreams, not everything will go as planned, but it is how you respond and what you learn along the way that will enhance the experience and help you arrive at your destination with even more appreciation for what you will have achieved.

~One of my favorite moments seen during the London Olympics 2012 Opening Ceremonies – July 27th~

Whether you are seeking excellence in your career, how you raise your children, how you care for your health, how you establish and create a simply luxurious life, building the relationships you are involved in or constantly striving to reach your full potential, knowing how to create the culture of excellence is important to eventually experiencing it.

Below are the steps to follow as you begin on the path to excellence:

1. Determine what excellence looks like to you. Try to be very specific, but at the same time do not allow for mediocrity. The advice that fits well here is, “Always do your best.” If at any time during the process, you know you could have done more, trained harder, held your tongue, been more supportive, put in more time researching, then you know you settled for mediocrity. Often the results may be out of our control, but the effort we put in isn’t. So on that note, when determining what excellence looks like, describe the journey in just as much detail as you would the destination.

2. Clearly define the values that must be included in order to achieve excellence. If you have set a goal of becoming an Olympic athlete, but you have to use performance enhancing drugs to attain it, this would not be the path to excellence because you’ve compromised your values. What do you value? Why do you value it? If in your relationships, you value respect, loyalty and honesty, continually find ways to exhibit and build the values that are of importance to you. Excellence has the potential of being felt in the small actions that occur every single day. How are you building what you want to see more of? What values are you supporting?

3. Clearly communicate your values. Once you know what you want to achieve and how you want to achieve it, you will need to communicate this with those that are working with you or for you (if you are a coach, manager, head of a company, etc). In order to create strong relationships with those we work with and spend our lives with, we can’t assume they know what we value unless we communicate with them.

4. Align what you say with what you do. A certain way to gain respect, support and more effort from those around you is to align what you say with what you do. Hypocrisy is a surefire way to lose what you most likely desire – support, confidence and respect. Granted we will all stumble, but as long as we stumble forward and learn to not make the same mistake in the future, we are headed in the right direction – towards excellence.

5. Consistently adhere to your professed values. Along those same lines, hold fast to your direction and how you are attaining the current results as you align your words and actions repeatedly and consistently. A person of good character is revealed when what is done while nobody’s watching is still something that is in line with what they would do if a crowd surrounded them. Ultimately, consistency is the factor in reaching success, and the act of consistent best efforts is an act of excellence.

“If you are going to achieve excellence in big things, you develop the habit in little matters. Excellence is not an exception, it is a prevailing attitude.” –Colin Powell

Images: (1) pinterest (2) source

Oprah’s Goodbye

In a custom L’Wren Scott coral silk dress with degrade chiffon belt, Oprah Winfrey walked onto the stage of The Oprah Winfrey Show for the last time. The guest, the best guest, the only guest that was necessary, was Oprah herself.

Introducing the last hour as her love letter to her viewers, Oprah spoke of the many lessons she had learned, and so I’ve collected a few of them here as I had to write them down for myself, and wanted to share with you as well.

While I thoroughly enjoyed the show, my favorite part was the last shot, as she finished the long walk through her Harpo staff and was greeted in the front of her office by Sadie, her blonde cocker spaniel, as we watch Oprah with Sadie in her arms saying, “We did it Sadie. We did it.”

Someone who always listened to her calling, who is and was strong enough to be who she knew she could be and will always be an inspiration to the world. Here’s to living our best life.  Thank you Oprah for reminding us that we can.

“Be more of yourself.”

“We are all called. Everyone has a calling. And your real job in life is to figure out what that is and get about the business of doing it.”

“That is what a calling is. It lights you up and lets you know that you are exactly where you are supposed to be, doing exactly what you’re supposed to be doing. And that is what I want for all of you.”

“Live from the heart of yourself.”

“You have to make a living, I understand that, but you also have to know what sparks the light in you so that you in your own way can illuminate the world.”

“Start embracing the life that is calling you and use your life to serve the world.”

“Nobody but you is responsible for your life.”

“Don’t wait for somebody else to fix you, to save you or to complete you.”

“We often block our own blessings because we don’t believe we are inherently good enough or smart enough or pretty enough or worthy enough.”

“You are worthy because you are born and because you are here. Your being here, your being alive makes worthiness your birthright. You alone are enough.”

“Everybody wants to be validated.”

“Be still and know it.”

“Wait and listen for the guidance that is greater than my meager mind.  The only time I have ever made mistakes was when I didn’t listen.”

“What are the whispers in your life? Your life is speaking to you. What is it saying?”

“Your life is always speaking to you.”

Image: StyleWriterNYC

Oprah’s Final Farewell is Coming – A Preview

Yesterday, the final hours of The Oprah Winfrey Show at the United Center in Chicago were taped in front of 13,000 fans for just over four hours. The stars were out to bid Ms. Oprah a grand, very grand farewell. From Will and Jada Smith, Madonna, Maria Shriver, Usher, Halle Barry, Tom Cruise and so many more, they flocked to pay tribute for Oprah’s spectacular 25 year celebration and impeding good-bye. Just looking at the photos stirs up a bag of mixed emotions for me.  An extraordinary lady who’s daily presence will be missed.

The last episodes will begin Monday, May 23rd and run through Wednesday, May 25th, and while I’m not sure how I’m going to watch it, I have a feeling I will need some tissues, maybe a good glass of wine and the DVR prepped and ready to go, so that she will be able to be viewed whenever I need some daily inspiration.  Have a look at the photos that were captured.

Images from Marie Claire

What Will Your Legacy Be?

“If we’re following our passions, every decision will teach us how to be better at being ourselves, which will allow us to be the master of our own lives.”

-Oprah Winfrey (a lesson learned from Condoleezza Rice)

We are what we do. We will be remembered for what we leave behind.  Long after we are gone, what will each of us be remembered for? Whatever it is, whatever springs to mind immediately upon uttering our names, is the legacy we have created while we were living.

So what legacy are you leaving behind? I truly believe that no matter what religion one follows, or what spiritual path a person feels guides them, each one of us is responsible for leaving this place we call Earth a little better than when we found it.  How we improve upon what is already here is determined by what we are capable of doing and how we choose to coordinate our abilities with opportunities that present themselves.

The leaving of a legacy at first may seem like a weighty responsibility too difficult and burdening to contemplate, and due to this, many may choose to cast it aside and just live day to day appeasing their personal passions, but I believe it is in the meshing of these personal passions with philanthropic efforts that we will truly find great success, value and fulfillment.

 

It is in the helping of mankind whether it be one or millions that creates a legacy to be proud of.  It is in the determination to be the best at any given moment that gives way to a better result than what was found before the task initially commenced. It is in the thinking beyond ourselves and sharing our gifts with others that ultimately keeps us alive while we are still living and when our time has come.

Recently with the news in Japan and some saddening news I received about a colleague, I’ve been pondering the question of what can I do? What can each person do to make a difference, a real difference in this world? Because after all, so much of life is out of our control.

And the answer is, whatever you do, start today because before you know it today is tomorrow and yesterday is last year, and your efforts will have added up more than you could have imagined.  The question is what do you want to multiply during your time here on earth?

 

Do you want to see more hope, more goodness, more compassion, or acceptance, knowledge & awareness? Do you want to encourage, reward and support the way you believe life should be lived? Or do you want to waste time on what discourages you?  Truly, what you focus on multiplies.

Maybe it is just sitting down at night to read a story to your children instead of letting them go off and watch television by themselves before bed, or thanking someone for being thoughtful even in the simplest way, or choosing to approach each day with the intention of making at least someone’s day a bit brighter, by stating what you observe to be good work, or patting them on the back for what about their effort was appreciated. Reward what you deem valuable and it will be passed on twofold, sometimes more.

So today, think about what message your actions are saying to the world? Do they coincide with the world you’d like to one day see? After all, we are what we do because our actions determine our future and the world’s.

Have a beautiful Monday and have confidence that each step, no matter how small, if made in good faith, will reap a beautiful reward – whether we see it during our lifetime or it occurs down the road, trust that it will occur.

Images: (1) Musings In Femininity (2) Baroque Simplicity (3) Musings In Femininity  (4) Sebastian

Rules Of Style – Jenna Lyons

Tall and lanky, motivated and loyal, casual, yet very stylish, Jenna Lyons is at the top of my style icon list.  Being a woman myself near the 6’0” mark, I admire how self-assured Lyons carries herself in her 6’0” frame. And even more reassuring is how she owns her style. Never does it appear that she is imitating someone else’s suggestions or ideas (although I’m sure she has many inspirations). She consistently strides in heels, sometimes sequins with a mixing of masculine boyfriend jeans to major events in New York City being the Executive Fashion Director for J.Crew, and for these reasons I applaud her and continue to be inspired.

Not only does she demonstrate her eye for beautiful style in fashion, but her home as well in Brooklyn is stunningly casual, yet sophisticated (click here to see inside).

Elle and Elle Decor have also taken notice of Lyons knack for style as is demonstrated her list of the 12 Things She Can’t Live Without and a party she threw in her home – Jenna Throws A Party.

With her style in mind, let’s take a look at her rules.

Tights & Heels

One signature piece of Jenna’s wardrobe that always catches my attention is her choice to wear tights (usually grey) with open-toe heels.  Instantly her confidence and creativity are revealed, and she demonstrates how you can dress such a look up or down (and stay a smidge warmer at the same time).

Feminine & Masculine

What you will notice in almost all of the photographs taken of Jenna is her ability to mix feminine pieces (heels, fur, sequins) with a touch of masculinity (collared shirts, trouser pants, camouflage, etc). She stated on her interview with Oprah last season that one of the rules she lives by is to mix tomboy touches with feminine pieces, and she  demonstrates regularly, she does it very well.

Sequins

Another one of her fashion favorites is sequins. The idea of wearing sequins during the day is gradually become more acceptable, and I couldn’t be more thrilled. Whether it be a blouse, a cardigan, harem pants, or a clutch, sequins make a confident feminine statement.

Red Lips

In a word – gutsy. In the same breath, however, I would say Hollywood glamour as well. There is something regal, stunning and at the same time commanding about a woman who wears red lips well.  They can almost be an accessory all on their own.

A Bit Bohemian

Jenna’s typically loose tresses and fashionable layers reveal her casual side, yet at the same time upon closer examination, it all works perfectly.  While it may seem a bit more casual than one would expect, she owns.  A bohemian blouse? Cinch it with a belt.  A classic blazer? Add a faux fur skirt.  Attending Fashion Week in New York? Wear jeans, but with fabulous Stella McCartney heels. You get the idea.

A Blazer

Even during the day, Lyons demonstrates that a woman can look feminine, but still be in command while in the office.  Wearing a three-quarter length blazer with a skirt and tights is a fantastic way to bring balance and professionalism into the working day.

As shown above, Jenna Lyons creates her own rules of style and reveals to everyone why confidence in knowing who you are, what looks best on you and what works well together can be a very successful combination.

Below are a few other impressive women who have created their own Rules of Style:

*Inès de la Fressange

*Jennifer Aniston

*Tory Burch

Images: (1)  Source (2) J.Crew (3) Source (4) Source (5) Source (6) Source (7) Source (8) Source (9) Source (10) Source (11) Source

2010 Met Gala Red Carpet

Graceful long dresses stole the show on the red carpet for the 2010 Metropolitian Museum of Art Costume Institute Gala themed "American Woman: Fashioning a National Identity". To learn more of the many details this event focused on click here. 

Personally, I was very impressed with the choices displayed – simple lines, clean sleek gowns, with many women choosing to sweep their hair off of their face.  Absolute elegance was the look of choice as you will see from the images I gathered as some of my favorites.

Diane Kruger in Calvin Klein

Kate Bosworth in Valentino Haute Couture

Karlie Kloss, in Donna Karan

Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen in Alexander Wang

Amber Valletta, in RM by Roland Mouret, with Tiffany & Co. jewels and a Roger Vivier clutch

Rachel Weisz in Oscar de la Renta

Michael Kors with Brooke Shields, in a dress by the designer, with Fred Leighton jewels

Donna Karan, in her own design

Zoe Saldana in Calvin Klein

Emmy Rossum, in Kenneth Cole, with House of Lavande jewels

Rachel Zoe in Marc Jacobs

Tory Burch

Kristin Davis

Anne Hathaway in Valentino

Jessica Stam wearing Bulgari jewelry

Sarah Jessica Parker in Halston Heritage

Naomi Campbell in Dolce & Gabbana

Jennifer Lopez, in Zuhair Murad, with Cartier jewels and a Judith Leiber clutch

Stella McCartney, Liv Tyler, and Kate Hudson all in Stella McCartney

Oprah Winfrey in custom Oscar de la Renta

Two ladies that were a treat to follow on Twitter tonight with regards to the Gala were Tory Burch and Rachel Zoe.

Now this is an event that I would gladly choose to attend, if ever I was invited, before attending the Academy Awards – New York City, Fashion the focus and a themed event – so much fun indeed.

Images courtesy of Coutorture, Style.com and Habitually Chic (Tory Burch)